To free up more time in your life, writer Caroline Sylge proposes a creative idea: Give yourself a “say no” retreat. It’s a day to look at your calendar and thoughtfully decline obligations in the next few weeks and months.

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How is your to-do list looking for the next few weeks? If it’s already full of obligations and tasks you’ve been dreading, and ramping up toward the holidays, you might need a “say no” retreat.

That’s one of dozens of creative ideas in Caroline Sylge’s book, How to Retreat: A Guide to Stepping Away from the Everyday to Find Space for Yourself, published this spring.

A “say no” retreat is a day to brainstorm all the things you want to say no to in your life in the coming weeks and months, she says. Then, you’ll spend the last part of your day saying no to a few of those things.

Sylge, who has spent the last 30 years attending and organizing health and wellness retreats around the world, developed this exercise to help people reclaim their time.

“We often say yes for reasons that have nothing to do with what’s good for us, because we feel like we should, don’t want to seem difficult or fear missing out,” Sylge says. “Saying ‘no’ is uncomfortable, but is a brave act of self-respect.”

Devoting a whole day to saying “no” may seem like a wild idea, but with the holidays on the horizon, it may make room in your life for the things that matter. Here’s how to do it.

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Design your one-day, “say no” retreat: A suggested schedule 

Before you start: Pick a day on your calendar to do your “say no” retreat. That might mean calling out of work or moving obligations. Then find a comfy place in your home to reflect.

Right when you wake up, make a list of things you want to say no to in your life. What immediately comes to mind? Name anything obvious you don’t want to do. For example, coordinating a big potluck for your book club or making a complicated dish for that dinner party on Saturday.

Then eat some breakfast and get yourself into nature to give yourself some time to think about your list. Maybe take a bike ride or a walk.

After your break, come back to your designated retreat space and build on your list. Add to that initial “say no” list by thinking about your upcoming days, weeks and months. Look at your digital calendar if you need to, but make sure your notifications are turned off, Sylge writes in her book.